Why is it so hard to fit in and form deeper, more meaningful connections?

Sometimes, fitting in feels like trying to solve a puzzle where all the pieces look identical but none of them seem to actually *fit*. You know that feeling? You’re surrounded by people, and somehow you still feel a little… disconnected, like you’re on the edge of a conversation that you can never quite break into.

I think a lot of us get caught up in the idea that everyone else has this unspoken, magical skill for making close connections – like they’re effortlessly sliding into deep, meaningful relationships while we’re left circling on the outskirts, wondering why we can’t seem to do the same.

The reality? Most people are faking it to some degree. I mean, we all walk into social situations with a little bit of armour on, don’t we? We’re trying to project what we think others want to see, hoping it will help us fit in. But the catch is, the more we polish up our armour, the harder it becomes to let people in. It’s like we’re all playing this weird social poker game, only showing the cards we think others want to see. Spoiler alert: everyone else is bluffing too.

What really helps is leaning into authenticity. Sounds cheesy, but bear with me. When you start letting the “real you” come out—quirks, flaws, odd sense of humour and all—that’s when deeper connections start to form. It’s scary, right? Letting down your guard feels risky. But there’s something pretty magical about how people respond when you’re just *yourself*. When you stop trying to fit in, you often find that you naturally start connecting with people who get you. You know, the ones who don’t make you feel like you need to trim bits of your personality away just to be accepted.

Also, making deeper connections isn’t something that happens overnight. You’re not going to go from casual acquaintance to ride-or-die friendship in a week. And that’s okay! Take your time with it. Keep showing up. Keep being present. Share a little more of yourself each time. And don’t forget that even when it feels like you’re struggling to fit in, you’re not alone in that feeling. Plenty of people around you are quietly going through the same thing.

So yeah, maybe fitting in is overrated. Maybe it’s not about perfectly slotting into some group like you’re a missing piece of their puzzle. Maybe it’s about creating your own unique little corner where you can be you, and then inviting people in who actually vibe with that. Keep going, keep being you—sooner or later, the right connections will fall into place.